im fucked up. end of story.
my mother took me out of my show tonight and i think i might kill her. not only did she cause a scene, but she did it in front of not only everyone i know, but also compelte strangers. made me lose my great place. I didn't get to buy merch or talk to lee. that just made me angry. i think i can live with that.
but the fact that she had no remorse for it, and that she didn't care that it was taking Kaeley and I away form each other pissed me off the most. i have no friends. zero. im tired of being alone all the time. im alone at home. im alone at school. im alone. all the time. im tired of being alone. when Kaeley is around I don't worry about it. I don't cry every morning before I go to school. I don't dread going to sleep because it means the next day comes faster. I don't hate my life as much. I don't get onto the verge of tears when I open my locker.
She doesn't get that I can't talk to Kaeley all the time. Texting is a hassle and we both hate phone calls. it isn't the same.
and then she tells me that shes sick and needs to go home, and that brian has to get up early. we get home before the show is over, and they sit around for another hour. my mom is still awake and not sick at all.
its such fucking bull shit.
my grandfather hopefully bought my crv today.
the day i get my full license i am never coming home.
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