Care-Net

So today we were force-fed the bible by a couple of bitches from care-net. while i understand where they came from, they did it in the completely wrong manner. We were forced to pray and listen to this bitch go on and on about how last year 54 children were aborted in Hancock and Daviess County combined. Together, that is about 100,000 people in those two counties. That isn't an insanely huge number, 54.
now, I personally believe in the right to abort your child. It isn't murder to me. Should every pregnant teenager have an abortion? Absolutely not. But is there a right for a woman, her life, and her body to be able to abort an unborn child? Absolutely. There are risks to pregnancy and if my child is going to have such severe birth defects that i cannot help it, will be stillborn, could kill me, was the child of a rape or incest relationship, i would abort the child personally. That is my choice as a woman.
But to have this woman come into my public, governmentally paid for school and give us candy for having fake STDs, give us stickers that say 'Pet Your Dog, Not Your Date', tell us that not even in a steady relationship of five years is it safe to have sex, that everyone in the room including the pastor is going straight to hell, to shove bibles into everyones hands, and pray over us and ask us to join is just wrong.
I go to a public school. I had the right to leave, but I wasn't about to be the weak one. I was going to sit through that stupid motherfucking presentation and scoff.
Seperation of Church and State is in the document that built our country, yet a company like CareNet allows these people to come into my school and force these things down our throats. There was a huge, huge part of me that wanted to stand up and give those people a piece of my mind, but I didn't. I did however say "Geez Care Net, thank you so much for pretty much forcing me to give oral to your bible. I could always consider that premarital sex." to someone I was talking to as we left the gym.
I hate the US Government sometimes.
This is why 'Gays' cant marry.

You are sensitive to a fault. The slightest out-of-earshot whisper or behind-the-back rumor will floor you. You’re a water sign, but unlike the other two—-Cancer and Scorpio—you have no outer shell to protect you. So instead, you swim away. Your defense is to hide, either shutting yourself off in a room or, if that’s not possible, withdrawing mentally into your potent imagination. This is how you write most of your poetry, or paint your most passionate pieces—in a highly-charged, defensive emotional state that’s often triggered by an overheard comment or casual criticism.

Your other defense mechanism is to disappear. You have the uncanny ability to quietly metamorphosize into the walls, becoming unapproachable and therefore reasonably invisible to anyone else in the vicinity.

Both of these reactions, obviously, are dangerously anti-social. If channeled creatively, they can be quite therapeutic, but if not, you need a strong balancing force—either a mate or close friend with a strong foundation, or even therapy.

This state can also lead to an overabuse of drugs or alcohol. You don’t have the constitution, either physically or emotionally, to withstand their affects, and you become addicted easily. You tend to resort to them much too quickly, and the problem just worsens from there.

On a more practical level, you tend to lack self-discipline. Some would say you’re just plain lazy, but it’s more that you’re not interested in mundane facts or routines. You’re so involved in your imaginative world that things like bills and responsibilities are a lesser priority. Here again, you need the balance of a mate who is business-minded and pragmatic.

Finally, you have a hard time making up your mind about anything. You are a wonderful adapter, a chameleon even—if you’re interested in someone who is passionate about, say, gardening, you immediately will learn everything there is to know about gardening, so you can enjoy it with them. Most of the time, though, you’ll find that you’ll soon lose interest and something else will fascinate you. That’s okay, as long as those around you understand and appreciate your free-spirited playfulness. If not, find someone who does.

The Claddagh Ring.

"The Claddagh's distinctive design features two hands clasping a heart, and usually surmounted by a crown. The elements of this symbol are often said to correspond to the qualities of love (the heart), friendship (the hands), and loyalty (the crown).

 

The way that a Claddagh ring is worn on the hand is usually intended to convey the wearer's romantic availability, or lack thereof.

 

Traditionally, if the ring is on the right hand with the heart facing outward and away from the body, this indicates that the person wearing the ring is not in any serious relationship, and may in fact be single and looking for a relationship: "their heart is open."

 

When worn on the right hand but with the heart facing inward toward the body, this indicates the person wearing the ring is in a relationship, or that "someone has captured their heart".

 

A Claddagh worn on the left hand ring finger facing outward away from the body generally indicates that the wearer is engaged.

 

When the ring is on the left hand ring finger and facing inward toward the body, it generally means that the person wearing the ring is married."

I turned my ring over for you today. I know that we aren't anything. I know that we never will be, but the way you make me feel makes me believe that I wont find anyone better. They say there are other fish in the sea - that there is no such thing as a soulmate, only people you are compatible with. I refuse to believe that. I think that you might be the one that is my soulmate, or maybe, if you believe that way, the one I'm compatible with. I just wish that you could see and understand that the same way I do.

I was on the bus this afternoon on the way home from State Concert Festival, and while I should have been happy that we got a distinguished rating, I couldn't help but wonder if you would be proud of me. Every song on my iPod reminded me of something we had talked about, something that you implied to me, or something you meant to me. Never have I been this so... deep. 

I question everything now. I overanalyze everything. Maybe it's me growing up, maybe it's be going over my head in thoughts and wondering, hoping for the best. I even wrote a song for you. I'll never share it - I'll never finish it. I've learned songs for you. I know the things we have in common - art and music. you have the IQ of a genius, and you're becoming an artist. You play those shitty guitars in a way that makes me melt. 

Maybe it's because we're so similar and yet so different. But whatever it is, I wish you could see it the way I do.

I hope you and her the best. She isn't me - she will never be me. I will never be lucky enough to be in her place. But I am willing to wait. I am willing to sit back and wait it out - hope that you are happy. And I hope to god that you were serious about being my prom date my senior year. I would travel to see you - I'd travel miles. But I can't. I'm lowly and boring and poor. 

but as great as you make me feel - you also deserve the best, and that is what only she can give you. i can't do that. I keep hoping that maybe if I move on, flirt and do terrible things to my body, that I'll get over you. But I think the only way that I can do that... is to tell you straight up and get your reaction. 

I know what I'm hoping for, but I know what I'll get.

I just hope you meant it when you said you and I would still be close in thirty years. 

Rebecca Fuqua today was taking to Taylor Copeland about suicide and then about five minutes after their conversation was over, Rebecca turned around and looked at me and legitimately and honestly asked me if she had offended me. She looked genuinely scared that she had done something wrong and that she had killed my spirit.
Sigh. I need to get out of my head and accept the fact that people just believe I'm a suicidal, dykey lesbian.

Jenna is quite possibly my favorite youtuber.

you get a certain feeling when you find someone whose special to you. and i can't help but get that feeling every single time we talk. and i know it isn't much for someone as small as me to give a shit about someone as magnificent as you, but... somehow, i wish it mattered.

"It's not something I'm just quite ready to tell you yet, Sarah. One day... when I'm not terrified I'll tell you. It could make me feel better... it could kill me. It just depends, yaknow? Anyways. Have a good sleep. I love you."
"I know the feeling, bb. Like I said, you've got me whenever you're ready. Even if its in thirty years. i love you too."

just come to me like now.

"As the record became apparent to me, at the very least I was trying to leave a message in a bottle for my daughter. Instead of making a record about being a new dad, it was more about, like, I want this record to be for her at 15, or whatever. And that’s the notion of where ‘Save Yourself, I’ll Hold Them Back’ came from. Because it’s a song that I want her to look back on, and if anything ever were too happen… her to know that her dad and her uncles are like these guys who were actually, um, not necessarily always cupcakes."